


how terrible it is to love something death can touch

by Bitchey_tozier



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Bisexual Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak Loves Richie Tozier, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gay Eddie Kaspbrak, Ghost Eddie Kaspbrak, Good Parents Maggie & Wentworth Tozier, Homophobia, M/M, Richie Tozier Loves Eddie Kaspbrak, Richie Tozier Works Through His Issues, Richie has internalized homophobia, Sonia Kaspbrak's A+ Parenting, Supernatural Elements, don't read if u wanna have a good time, eddie has lil suspenders, fuckin uhhhhh, ghost au, just tagging as I go, kinda angsty ngl, richie loves his walkman, sonia is a bitch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-21
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:21:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26024137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bitchey_tozier/pseuds/Bitchey_tozier
Summary: Richie spends most of his days alone in Derry Maine's graveyard, that is until a boy starts popping up at the most unexpected moments.It just get weirder from there.Because maybe he's falling in love with this boyand maybe he saw the boys name on one of the gravestones by the church, too.Yeah, Richie would say this is getting pretty fucking weird(This entire fic is based off a prompt that I read a while ago and i'm like 80% sure that the entire thing was a fever dream)
Relationships: Eddie Kaspbrak & Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier
Comments: 6
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

Fall was always Richie's favorite season. If you were to ask him why, he'd probably say something along the lines of, _“because i can wear a pair of ripped jeans without fucking overheating or freezing to death”_ and the person asked would either laugh, or scowl at him because no one asks you what season is your favorite unless you’re five or in a counsellors office dumbass.  
But if Richie we’re to put some real thought to the question, he'd tell you that he loves the way the trees on his street always turn a crisp orange, one you'd only think to see in New York or somewhere that they actually take care of the environment. Or he'd say that he loves it because fall is usually referred to as a scary season and Richie's all-time-ultimate-favorite genre is horror so it only makes sense that he liked it.

Something along those lines.

But if Richie was being completely honest and didn't wanna look like a complete fucking psychopath, he’d say that he like’s Fall because the Derry graveyard is always the prettiest during that season.

That's where he is right now, conveniently. He spends most of his days walking the rows of headstones up to the little gazebo that sat at the very peak of a little hill. Usually he'd sit down and turn on his walkman, play a few mixtape's until the sun would start to disappear from the horizon and he'd have to walk home before his supper got cold and his mom got worried.

But other times he'd sit with really old graves and talk to the air, as if he wasn't alone in the park.

It never did feel like that anyway.

So it didn't scare him too much when he got up to the gazebo and spotted another boy sitting in his usual spot, silently gazing out at the rows of stone.

The closer he got to the boy, the odder it seemed he became, first it was his clothes, it looked like he was wearing a knitted pullover with some trousers, which wouldn't be too weird if they didn't look old as fuck -like, something Richie would find in his great grandpas old chest in their attic type of old - but whatever, maybe hes just older than he looks.

Once Richie got closer, a few thoughts went through his brain, the first was _‘he isn't old, he looks younger than me, at least by a few years,maybe a sophomore.’_ then the boy turned his way, and Richie realized that his eyes were a cold grey, one that looked almost lifeless. So naturally Richie's brain says _‘this doesn't seem like a good idea’_ right as it also says _‘he's kind of cute’_. His stomach sours at both of the thoughts.

He doesn't know what to do in this situation, because no one is ever up here but him and maybe the odd old lady on an early Friday morning or something.

So, he gulps down his fear and opens his mouth.

“Hey there!” he says in an overly cheery tone as he makes it to the gazebo, the boy startles a bit before making eye contact with Richie, he looks a little more than taken aback.

“You can see me?” the boy says in a disbelieving tone, his eyebrows are drawn up to his hairline and Richie would have the sense to make a joke or laugh if that comment didn't freak him the fuck out.

“Uh…..yeah?” he says, still keeping his distance from the boy. The boy furrows his brow for a second while looking around the park, as if he thought someone was pranking him.

It seems that eventually he realizes that this isn't a prank and a ghost of a smile spreads across his face while turning his gaze up to Richie.

“Well, I'm Edward, ‘Eddie’ to my friends, pleased to make your acquaintance.” the boy - Eddie - says while standing up and holding his hand out to Richie, as if he were asking to shake his hand, Richie lets his guard down a bit and just decides that this kid can't be too bad, he looks harmless.

“Richie” Richie says while staring down at their now joint hands shaking between them, Eddie’s hands are cold, like ice fucking cold, Richie wonders how long hes been sitting out here to get to that body temperature.

“Do you come here often?” Eddie asks with a curious look in his eye, Richie snorted at the accidental use of a pickup line and strode over to sit down on the wooden bench that wrapped around the gazebo, Eddie sitting back down next to him. Richie stretched his legs out under him with a groan before answering.

“Probably more than I should,” Richie chuckles, he turns to look at Eddie “What about you? I don't think iv'e ever seen you here before.” Eddie gave Richie a small smile before turning back towards the horizon, the setting sun reflecting off all the rows of headstones, some relatively new, others unbelievably old. Richie has no clue how old Derry is, but he's pretty sure that it's older than the black plague.

“I've only ever been on this side a few times,” Eddie says in a faint voice, his eyes never leaving the setting sun. “Mother likes to keep a close eye on me.” he says, his shoulders slouching slightly at the mention of her. Richie laughs, “She the one that makes you wear these god awful sweaters?” Richie teases while tugging at the hem of Eddie's sweater,  
“Like yeah, i have terrible fashion sense, but this is just horrible Ed's.” 

Eddie's nose scrunches up at the nickname, “that's god awful Richie.” he scowls, but it's obvious he’s fighting back a smile, Richie's heart flutters and then seems to jump to his throat after he processes the feeling.

“I've never even seen you in town,” Richie ponders aloud while staring at Eddie's hazelnut hair, neatly parted back, gelled down, pristine and perfect. It kind of reminds Richie of how Stan keeps his hair, albeit Stan still has flyaways due to the natural spring of his golden locks, Eddie's hair is clean cut, so much the point that Richie debated on reaching out and running a hand through it just to make sure it isn't plastic or something, but Eddie speaks before he can reach his hand out.

“I, uh-” he clears his throat, looking a little panicked by the question, Richie tilts his head at him like a dog “M-me and my mom live on the other side of town, you see,” Eddie chuckles nervously, is hands gripping his slacks so hard his knuckles turn a faint pale, “i don't leave the house too much, only when necessary.” he sounds a little strained when he finishes the sentence, and Richie immediately feels guilty.

“Shit, Eds. I'm sorry.” Richie says while reaching over to rest his hand on Eddie's shoulder, Eddie flinches at the contact at first, but quickly relaxes into it while Richie rubs reassuring circles into his shoulder blade with his thumb.

Richie's faintly aware that he shouldn't be putting his hand on Eddies shoulder, given he's a stranger and Richie met him not even ten minutes ago and _what if he can tell i'm-_

Richie pulls his hand back slowly, once it thumps back onto the wood of the bench their both perched on, Eddie turns to him, grey boring into Richie's Atlantic blue eyes. Eddie seems to get lost in them for a second before snapping out of it and looking at the ground, then again Richie could be just imagining this shit. _He has no fucking clue anymore._

“It's fine.” Eddie finally responds after a beat, his leather shoes tapping together idly from where they hung off the bench.

After the awkward moment passes, they’re able to fall into a pretty nice rhythm with conversation, which all involves Eddie's lack of knowledge to any superhero other than superman. Richie spends a whole thirty minutes explaining who Wonder Woman is and why she's his favorite hero afterwards, Eddie's eyes seem to sparkle as Richie explains with as much enthusiasm as a kid finding out they were going to Disneyland. His hands punctuating every syllable, Eddie's giggles spurring him on throughout the entire time.

The sun begins to set, and Richie tells Eddie that he has to go before his mom files a missing persons report. Eddie looks sullen, his eyes drifting downward, it cracks Richie's heart in two and drops it into the acid that sits in his stomach.

“Will i see you again?” Richie asks as he reaches the steps to the gazebo. Eddie hums,  
“Possibly.” he replies, eyes trained on something off in the distance, Richie fiddles with his walkman as he slowly inches down the steps.

“Well,” Richie says as he meets the gravel path that stretches out towards the exit. Eddie looks up at him and smiles. “See ya soon Ed's.” he says with a smile.

Eddie snorts, “don't call me that.” he says, his eyes soft as he stares at Richie.  
“I'll be seeing you then.” Eddie says before turning back to look out at the horizon, Richie gives a two fingered salute before bounding down the path towards the setting sun that's almost disappeared completely, whistling a happy tune as he goes.

When he reaches the bottom of the hill, he looks back up, raising his hand to give Eddie one final wave goodbye, only to find that Eddie had vanished.


	2. under the willow tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Richie decides then and there, with Eddie under that willow tree, surrounded by the auburn leaves that twirl down into the overgrown grass. His back rested up against the stump, Eddie's thigh touching his, that this is where he wants to be for the rest of his life. With this boy that he hasn't even known for a full 24 hours, and that thought may terrify Richie more than clowns or the dark ever has, but he figures he could learn to face this fear if Eddie were by his side.

Richie didn't get back to the graveyard for another two days, making it Friday when he strides up to those familiar iron gates.

With the objective of - hopefully - finding Eddie, Richie starts to make his way up the hill towards the gazebo, only to see no one there. Not thinking too much of it, he pulls his jean jacket closer to his body, so the cold autumn chill doesn't leave him shivering, and decides to walk down the opposite side of the hill, towards the church that occupied the yard with the rows of stone. Richie usually steered clear of this side because of the church, but Eddie said his mom only ever let him on that side, so he figured he could ignore the impending feeling of bile that rose in his throat whenever he looked at the old building.

He trekked down the path for a few minutes, all the way down to where the graves were sinking into the earth below, old age decaying any history of the people that were buried on this side of the graveyard. Richie was just about ready to bolt back up the hill towards the entrance, that uneasy feeling of eyes boring into the back of his skull becoming too much to ignore when he finally spotted Eddie. He was sitting under one of the old willow trees, the dying leaves hanging limply around him. He was looking up towards the clouds, his brown eyes tracing shapes into the endless blue, Richie grinned and began walking over to him, shouting his name at a volume that was definitely not needed.

“Ed’s!” Richie shouted, his hands waving above his head, Eddie startled at the intrusive sound. His head whipping around towards Richie, Richie could see Eddie smile softly and turn back towards the sky.

“What’re ya doin’ over here?” Richie asked, sitting down in the overgrown grass next to Eddie, the glances at him, his freckles so prominent in the sunlight.

Eddie reminds Richie of long summer days, merigold sunsets that reflect off his glasses during those hot moments in Derry Maine, he reminds him of graceful wildflowers that dance in the breeze during springtime.

Eddie snaps Richie out of his daze with a small sigh, he focuses his eyes onto Eddie again and forces his brain to stop thinking about things he shouldn't even notice.

“I sit here a lot.” Eddie says, his hands plucking at the grass by his side, Richie stays silent, encouraging Eddie to continue. “its important to me in some ways, i guess. You see-'' Eddie moves his eyes so he's looking straight at Richie, their piercing grey sends a shiver down Richie's spine. “- I've been coming to this spot for years. Not to do anything in particular, really,” Eddie leans back against the stump of the tree, the sunlight bounces off his face in a lovely manner, leaving a watercolour of golds to shine over his porcelain skin. Richie tears his eyes away from him so he can stop those thoughts before they get worse. “I sit here for hours,” Eddie continues, “there's not much else to do here, and it's not like-” Eddie cuts himself abruptly, his posture going rigid.

“Ed’s?” Richie questions, Eddie slumps over “uh- yeah, sorry. Just a bit of a touchy subject in some ways, I suppose. it's not important.” 

Richie could disagree with that statement, considering Eddie just said that this place is _extremely_ important to him, but in the end he decides to just drop it so as to not make Eddie any more upset. He already hates the way Eddie curls in on himself, it makes him want to pull Eddie into his lap and hug him gently, to whisper sweet nothings into his ear while he peppers kisses along the back of his head. He goes a little pale at the thought, so as to change the subject, he quickly jumps into a story on what happened at school earlier in the day. Eddie listens intently, his eyes never leaving Richie. He encourages Richie to talk, which is something no one ever does with him. He's never gone so long in a ramble without hearing _‘beep beep Richie’_ from someone. 

It's refreshing in a way, To not have that weight in his chest that screams at him to _just shut up Richie_. Eddie will throw in his own opinions on a topic, or he’ll let out a giggle when Richie makes a decent joke. Richie will tease him over certain things like his clothing choice, which Richie notes is _the exact same fucking thing you wore yesterday_ , and Eddie will reply with a snarky comment, creating an endless exchange of insults that leave them both laughing so hard tears roll down their cheeks.

Richie decides then and there, with Eddie under that willow tree, surrounded by the auburn leaves that twirl down into the overgrown grass. His back rested up against the stump, Eddie's thigh touching his, that this is where he wants to be for the rest of his life. With this boy that he hasn't even known for a full 24 hours, and that thought may terrify Richie more than clowns or the dark ever has, but he figures he could learn to face this fear if Eddie were by his side.

Eventually, Richie has to leave again. forcing his body to untangle from the grass and Eddie's feet. Eddie looks up at him hopefully and asks “will you come back tomorrow?” Richie smiles fondly down at him, bringing one hand up to his chest and motioning it in an X shape.

“Cross my heart and hope to die.”

“Don't say things like that.” Eddie says in an almost serious tone, throwing Richie off his axes for a few seconds before he regains his bearings.

“Why is that?” he asks, a teasing lilt to his voice as to relive any tension between them. Eddie doesn't even hesitate when he says:

“Because then I wouldn't ever see you again.”

Boom. combo hit, Double whammy. Richie goes into shock for a few seconds, it feels as if Eddie pulled him in two. Like he dug into his chest cavity and ripped out his still beating heart for his own keeping. Richie doesn't think he'd really mind if Eddie did, as long as he took care of it and didn't crush it in his fist until it was only goo.

Richie leaves the graveyard with one final enthusiastic goodbye to Eddie before he begins his walk home, a smile permanently stuck on his face.

When Richie walks in the door of his house, the smell of pumpkin pie and cinnamon slaps him like a ton of bricks. He tugs off his chucks with his feet to dart to the kitchen, searching for what was making his house smell so amazing, what he found is his parents, both laughing as they twirl around on the tile floor, _roll over Beethoven_ blasting from the radio that sat perched on the island table. His mother giggled as his father twirled her before pulling her in for a chase kiss. Richie smiles at the scene, and prays to any god out there that this is what his future will look like. He prays that he'll be carefree and happy and in _love_.

The song soon ends, and he clears his throat before crossing the threshold into the kitchen as to not startle his parents, they both look over to him and smile, Richie returns the gesture as he sits down on one of the bar-stools near the island table.

“Where were you all day?” Maggie asks as she glides over to the oven, she pulls out one of the most gorgeous pies Richie has ever seen. “Just down at the graveyard.” Richie says as he shrugs off the jean jacket he had been wearing, absently tossing it into the living room somewhere, Maggie tuts and tells him to hang it up properly while she sets the pie on the windowsill to cool.

“What do you do down there all day?” Wentworth asks, sitting down next to Richie.

Richie looks over towards the window, the sun has nearly set, leaving the skyline a gorgeous pink.

“Really depends,” Richie says as he stretches his long legs out under him, “most of the time I just listen to music, it's quiet out there, so I can kinda focus down there, ya know?” Wentworth gives Richie a nod, as to say that he understands and also as an encouragement to continue.

“But lately… there has been this other boy down there.” Maggie and Wentworth both look at each-other, as if they're talking telepathically, Richie can't read their facial features, and that terrifies him, so he quickly opens his mouth to make sure that his parents don't start assuming anything. Richie isn't sure what they would do if they knew he… whatever. It doesn't matter, because he _isn't_. 

“We just kinda talk about comics and other stuff, it's nice to have someone to just ramble to. Cause he lets me do that. I don't know….” Richie says, his fingers drumming on the tabletop. “I've never seen him around town though.” he adds, almost as an afterthought, his parents both give him reassuring smiles.

“Well he sounds lovely.” His mother says as she dishes out their dinner.

“What's his name?” His dad asks as he stands up, heading towards the oven so he can help Maggie with grabbing plates.

“Eddie.” Richie says, smiling down at the table as he thinks of Eddie's vibrant laugh and wide doe eyes, so eager and curious to learn about the world. As if he'd never left his home before.

“You should invite him over for dinner.” Wentworth suggests, passing a plate of casserole to Richie with a fork, Richie thanks him before shoveling the food into his mouth.

“Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.” he says between bites.

Soon enough Richie's parents join him at the table. They talk about how their days went together, Richie tells them about how his biology teacher nearly burnt the school down after spilling some chemicals, and he makes his father laugh so hard the coke he was drinking spurted from his nose. Richie relishes in these moments where he feels normal, where he can forget all of his problems and just be with his family.

_It's kind of like how being around Eddie feels_ his mind quietly supplies as he washes his plate before heading upstairs for the night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE STAN GOOD PARENTS MAGGIE AND WENTWORTH TOZIER.
> 
> hope y'all liked this fluff cuz it only gets angsty from here


End file.
